1.

2.

3.

Oh the simple wonders of photoshop, unfortunately I am no extraordinaire though I certainly wish for the time devotion to this single skill. Work really does keep me away from fun, the money however is too tempting to refuse. Anyhow I have also designed new custom order signs for my etsy store.

1.

2.

[ click on picture to enlarge ]

On a rather unhappy note, the hubby is leaving soon once again. Two weeks flew by extremely quickly and quite unfairly so with our work schedules clashing. I finally decided to hell with geos and took an unpaid holiday yesterday ( saturday ) after ingratiating myself with my manager ( who is terrific btw ). Chocolate makes a great dessert but an even better bribe.  I decided that I was ready to face art again almost 2 years after 6 hours of art inundation at the lourve so we trudged onwards through the mud and rain of spring thunderstorms to the tokyo national museum to view the renoir exhibition. It was definitely fun but again I became overwhelmed and left after 2 hours of paint oggling.  It’s suppose to be dour tomorrow with the rain and gloom but I still have to visit the legal office to drop off our tax paperwork to get our money back. On top of that I have to take an exam tomorrow early in the morning. Brilliant.

Living really gets in the way of life.

brownies!

I savored every last delectable drop of the dark sweetness from the batter before my health conscience got the better of me and I had to wash it all down the drain. Very pleased that he liked it so much, it never ceases to amaze me that such a simple gesture is enough for him.

I am rather fortunate don’t you think?

LASIK surgery in Japan is not happening partly because I am terrified to death of becoming blind but mostly because the Japanese doctors don’t speak english and also don’t allow my translator-friend to be in the operating room. Wth.  I shall have to content with doing it back in the States where shit is more legit anyway.

On to other things. I have been too busy to even eat on certain days, my private students have quadrupled. I started with 3 in August last year and now I have like 9 students . That is awesome for my bank account pulling in another $1200 each month but money is never free. I am perpetually reeling from fatigue and at night I fall asleep thinking of tomorrow’s agenda. My life is constantly assaulted by the clock. Needless to say besides spending time with Patrick, and housework, both of my masters courses keep me really busy too, but thankfully my school has a laptop which I use to do my homework on when I am not having class. God knows what I would do without it, stay up till 4am in the morning probably. The extent of my work load is about 4 essays per week including 2 discussion topics and 2 discussion responses with proper APA citation. Nevertheless, I am coping well and my grades are in the 4.0 range though I expect I shall only take 1 module next semester with my private tutoring getting so busy. I actally work 6 days a week with Mondays being my only day off usually spent in the confines of my study, dutifully churning out essays. I don’t use any heating because I believe I work best in the cold. And it saves us about $300 a month! Besides the winters in Japan aren’t really that cold as to require heating. Maryland however, is another issue altogether.

Anyhow, I can hardly believe January came and gone just like that. Before I know it, I’ll be back in singy before too long on April 25th to May 10th.

Yup, tickets have been booked

And oh I forgot to mention that I am due for LASIK surgery on the 31st of this month, oh the anticipation to bid a (somewhat) permanent adieu to the world of glasses and contact lenses.

This brief update shall have to suffice for now, I still have two more items due for submission by this week for school.

Ganbatte!

First came the grad school textbooks that meandered their way from selected vendors into my stale life of work, I was grateful for the intervention then.

My husband came back 2 weeks after our rendevous in Singapore and we have been terribly busy since. Busy suffocating each other with love, busy with the occasional fight, busier still with the making up and finally getting ready the house for my family’s visit.

A list of things have been achieved since the last time I wrote on this sphere:

1. The dining table which sat in assorted brown boxes has been built by the abled hands of Patrick Moore, not without occasional outbursts of frustration and the incessant cacophony of our stereo .

2.  We finally bought a bed, sheets, duvet and pillows for the guest bedroom hurrah!

3. I finally purchased the much needed bathroom drawer for our collapsing pillar of towels

4. We FINALLY collected all the damn mail that was clogging up our mailbox for months because I am too weak and frail to carry it all by my lonesome self.

( only to clog it up somemore when my impending purchases from Bed Bath and Beyond — my staple household store )

5. I finally purged the most unpleasant person out of facebook and subsequently my life. Hint: SHE ha skin like the surface of the moon, personality like sin and is not the brightest tool in the shed.

6. Lasik may become a reality VERY soon.

7. Green card applications shall be in the works, soon

8. We finally bought a vacuum cleaner, say goodbye to painstaking sweeping of the floor with a little dustpan. Ha!

9. I want a siberian husky, in fact a specific one which we know will destroy our house completely

and lastly,

I am 23.

Of course, there have been more things to complain and sulk about, like for example the manager who complains about her weight but eats fast food daily. Or the co worker whose empty smile contains distrust( damn japs ) and the  impending departure of a dear friend.

But work is work and I constantly remind myself that Japan is but a small chapter in our lives.

These days, it seems everything is predictable down from the stock market to the number of suicides on a particular day of the month based on the weather forecast. When indeed, people react no different than a robot being programmed. Even their very choice of words are predictable!

Has the world come to this?

Life here is a clockwork that can be deceptively fulfilling on some days, on other days this society feels like a prison to which escape is forever futile. While the rest of the world raves on about Japan, completely oblivious to the throes of social problems that plague this country, 2 Japanese throw themselves infront of the oncoming train every other minute. There is a very good reason why Japan has the highest suicide rate in the world, the same number as the United States in a country that has half the population.

Japanese people live in an unforgiving society where each mistake warrants a swift and biting punishment. The system dictates everyday living, a clockwork prison where trains come right on the exact second, where a mistake no matter how minor could derails everything. This is a society that craves for murderous perfection and it is only dark irony that in a necropolis of the aged, the middle aged are addicted to self destruction.

Like toy soldiers dressed in the monotone uniform of corporate office wear, they all fall down.

Because when you are gone, my world starts to crumble and very quickly my façade of strength dissolves into an acerbic mess. I am left here, bitter and angry at the situation. At our situation.

But in complete honesty, except for your frequent occupational disappearances,  life in Japan has been generous. By the end of october, with my 3rd full paycheck I would be able to finish paying off all of my student loan. My pockets are deep and well-padded but like the travesty life is, I have found that when you’ve bought everything there is you want to buy, money no longer really makes you happy.

This is not to say that I have succumbed to sighing pathetically like nostalgic yuppies. I am immensely grateful with all this money but I am too heartbroken today to count my blessings. I was holding my own until now, but I suppose faced with the prospect of not seeing my husband until the end of next month can be quite daunting. Other couples have it easier. Not us.

Never us.

Depravity and deprivity. Such is the nature of the hidden maladies that fester in my soul. Until Patrick comes along and the lightness of his kisses give me redemption.

The entire fucking world is there.

I cursed in disbelief when I saw the insane line outside forever 21. There were security guards outside the 4 storey apparel store, and the line snaked past the next block.  I stood there for a second, mouth opened in pure, unadulterated shock before I was almost mowed over by two harajuku girls. My point about forever 21 is that the situation was absurd, because there wasn’t even a sale going on. And come on guys, its forever 21.

Time is money.

Miraculously, I shoved and pushed my way through the colony of bodies right into h&m. I’ve found that in this economic downturn , and generally the more expensive a store the less the crowd. Zara for example, was significantly less crowded than say h&m and needless to say, forever 21. The number of irritants and squealing high school girls also varies inversely to the price range of the particular store. Burberry was virtually a graveyard, so quiet I had a distinctly kafka-esque moment of feeling strangely trapped in a space warp. Time was made when I stepped out and melted into the deluge of people.

In Asia..

All your senses are invaded upon. Japan for me has become a place where my ears are incessantly abused by random vans shrieking incoherently in Japanese, or the annoyingly loud music that signals the arrival of the garbage truck  assailing my sweet slumber. Or the cacophony of salespeople yelling on the streets for a sale or promotion of some sorts. It is tragic irony that to mask the jarring dissonance of city life, my ipod sings at full volume a euphony of Lady GaGa and Chopin. This abuse doesn’t stop just at your ears. Flyers and packets of kleenex decorated with neon advertisements are thrust into your hand, personal space, face as you walk down the streets.  There’s always a random person dressed in a mish-mash of neon clothing sauntering down the road, completely oblivious to the world and to their hideous fashion sense.

In the busiest cities of Asia, the notion of personal space doesn’t exist.